Paye

Lately Jose and I have been having this feeling of conviction. It's been nagging me constantly. A feeling that's been telling me to take action in some way or another. But at the same time a sick feeling in my stomach reminding me that I'm trapped in a world that requires money. We've toyed with the idea of just leaving everything and going to a third world country as volunteers, but reality always sets in. There's a car commercial here in Spain that says, "We have an illusion of freedom, but we're tied to our jobs, our cars, our house, etc. Freedom isn't easy, it's going to be tough." Yes, I know, it's just a car commercial, but it's got some truth behind it.

So realizing that going to Africa was not feasible at the moment. We made the joint decision to meet Africa halfway. We thought long and hard and decided to sponsor a little girl in Segou, Malí. Her name is Paye Coulibaly and she's 9 years old.

After filling out the forms and clicking send, I felt like dirt. I'm not quite sure why, though. Maybe it was just seeing how easy it was and how ridiculously cheap it was. I thought I was going to have a feel good moment and pat myself on the back, but I didn't. I felt like a jerk. I don't want to do this type of thing out of pity or to just make myself feel good. I don't want to give 20 bucks and say, "Ok, I did my good deed for the day." I want it to be who I am.

The only thing that makes me happy is to know that Paye might have a chance to be a kid and go to school, be vaccinated, and have a full stomach. We've committed to give her that until she finishes school. I pray God will change Paye's life and that He'll change my heart.

Meet Paye.